


The Kiss Doctor

by bleep0bleep



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M, Practice Kissing, Virgin Derek Hale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-23
Updated: 2016-02-23
Packaged: 2018-05-22 19:04:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6090988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bleep0bleep/pseuds/bleep0bleep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“That’s me,” Derek says. “Are you, um— the Kiss Doctor?”<br/>“Stiles,” is the reply, and the guy grins. It’s charming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Kiss Doctor

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fauvistfly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fauvistfly/gifts).



> Happy happy belated birthday to the incredibly [fauvistfly](http://fauvistfly.tumblr.com), whose absolute most favorite trope in the world is practice kissing. I hope you like this one <3 
> 
> Thank you to J and M for all the help <3

Derek clicks “Next Episode” and slumps back into the couch, grabbing his bowl of popcorn and scowls when he finds it empty. He tosses the empty bowl on the floor, where it joins a slew of potato chip bags, candy wrappers, and empty soda cans. Derek should feel disheartened by the mess but doesn’t; he gets a strange bit of vindictive satisfaction, because he does not care anymore. On his way back from class he had to wait for this couple that was hogging up the entire sidewalk, holding hands and giggling and just being so cute, well good for them. Derek is fine. He can hold his own hand and eat food by himself and he is absolutely, absolutely _fine._

“Want me to pop you another bag, bro?” Boyd asks from the kitchen table, where he’s working on his homework.

“Sure,” Derek says gratefully. Boyd is the best.

The microwave starts humming away and Derek idly follows along another episode of the— what is he watching? He doesn’t even know. This is his life, because outside of going to classes and finishing his homework, Derek has absolutely No Life at college. Boyd’s always suggesting he play a sport or something, because then he could socialize with this teammates, but the thing is, Derek likes sports fine, he just hates the competitive aspect of it. And he doesn’t have any particular interest in any clubs he’s seen. And he’s not that great at making friends in the first place— Derek's face tends to intimidate people, apparently, and his usual tongue-tied-ness is often mistaken for being rude.

The door flings open and Erica waltzes in, greeting Boyd with a kiss. “Hey, Derek,” she says, too cheerfully. “So, you know my roomie Lydia has her girlfriend Allison visiting from Berkeley this week— their Spring Break is earlier than ours…”

“Kay,” Derek says, eyes glued to the TV.

Boyd coughs, and his voice lowers a bit. “I asked him a month ago when you told me, babe, but like, that was before… you know…”

“Oh my God, are you still hung up on what that dude said to you? That was like, a month ago.” Erica stalks over to the couch and grabs Derek’s remote, pausing the TV. “Listen. Just because one guy said you can’t kiss—”

“Three guys,” Derek mutters, more to himself than anything. “Five girls.”

“Okay, but it doesn’t mean you’re not dateable,” Erica says.

Derek shakes his head. “I don’t want to try anymore.”

He sighs. College is supposed to be a time not just for higher education, but a glorious experience where you’re living away from your parents for the first time and freedom and exploration. So many people are dating and having casual sex. It doesn’t help that all of Derek’s close friends are in relationships, like Erica and Boyd, or pretty much hooks up with a new person each week and then constantly talks about it, like Isaac.

The thing is, Derek doesn’t really have any experience. He pecked Paige on the lips once at the end of their first and only date, and then she’d giggled and said it was nice to try it out, but they did work better as friends. And he was too shy to approach anyone else before college. And now _at_ college, Derek feels like he’s constantly overwhelmed by the constant talk about sex floating through the campus and the dining halls.

Boyd is a considerate friend and roommate; they’ve worked out a system that they haven’t had to use much, especially since Lydia was studying abroad last quarter so Boyd and Erica spent a lot of nights in that dorm. On the rare occasion Derek will get a text from Boyd asking for their apartment for the night, and Boyd’s always saying he’s happy to do the same for Derek.

Derek just never seems to get that far.

Dates? Dates go fine. He can hold a conversation, if it’s one on one, especially if he likes someone. No— it’s the _kissing_ that messes Derek up, especially since he knows he’s terrible at it, he just gets so nervous and it always turns out awful.

_“Sorry, Derek,” Jacob says. “I just don’t see this working out for us.”_

_“But… we like each other,” Derek says, confused._

_Jacob sighs. “Yeah, I like you too. But I’m nineteen and I’m in college. I want to sow my wild oats, you know what I mean? I don’t want like, the perfect boyfriend right now. And honestly? You can’t kiss for shit. It’s like trying to make out with a sandwich, I swear, it’s the worst. I’d just rather save myself the time teaching you and just hook up with someone who knows what they’re doing.”_

“He’s making the Jacob face again,” Boyd says.

“No! Stop thinking about that asshole,” Erica says. “That guy was the worst. He didn’t deserve you, okay?”

“He was right,” Derek says, grabbing a pillow and clutches it to his chest. “I can’t kiss. Everyone I’ve ever kissed has like, made this awful face like, _oh, that’s terrible_. And like, I say I’m sorry and they’re like oh it’s fine, even though it’s not, and then they break up with me.”

“Oh...I just remembered something,” Erica says, her eyes lighting up. “Boyd! Have you ever heard of this guy called the Kiss Doctor?”

“Yeah, Isaac told me about him when we were going through that rough patch,” Boyd says. “We made it through, though.”

“Aww,” Erica says, kissing Boyd on the nose.

The microwave beeps and Derek rolls his eyes. He wants his popcorn but he doesn’t want to get off the couch, much less squeeze past Boyd and Erica in happy-relationship-land. He tries to focus on his episode, only vaguely paying attention to their conversation. It’s not like he doesn’t know what they’re doing; it’s probably going to end up with suggesting Derek set up an appointment with this guy or something. Whatever. Derek’s a lost cause, he’s accepted it, and they should accept it too.

“Isn’t the guy like a campus legend?” Boyd asks. “He’s helped so many people with their intimacy problems. Lydia’s even recommended him.”

Lydia Martin, the editor in chief of the campus’ award-winning newspaper? All around the most competent person Derek knows?

Maybe this Kiss Doctor really does help people, but Derek can already feel the surge of embarrassment rising hot inside him, just thinking about why this conversation is happening in the first place.

“Hey, grumpypants, I could ask her for his info for you!” Erica says brightly.

Derek mumbles into his pillow, trying to hide.

“Babe, can you get the popcorn?” Boyd asks, kissing Erica on the cheek.

Erica rolls her eyes but she gets up and makes for the microwave. Boyd walks over to Derek and joins him on the couch, patting his shoulder.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey,” Derek says from behind his pillow.

“You know that I’m down to help you with a lot of things, right? And I have offered to help you with your kissing thing. Like tips and stuff.”

“I don’t mind!” Erica calls from the kitchen. “I can help too!”

“You two are my friends. And you’re together. And I know you both too well. It’s weird,” Derek says. “Sorry. But thanks for the offer.”

“What about this Kiss Doctor guy?” Boyd asks. “It’s just some dude you don’t know. And like, no pressure too, because you’re not dating him. You don’t have to impress him.”

“That’s a good point,” Derek reluctantly admits. This might actually work, practicing on someone that he’s not attracted to.

 

* * *

 

It takes a few days, but Erica asks Lydia who checks in with the Kiss Doctor who then gets back to Erica who gives Derek a time and a date.

Derek paces back and forth in the apartment nervously. Boyd’s out at a marathon movie event with Erica and promised he’d take his time, and then gave him a solid pat on the shoulder and wished him luck.

What if the Kiss Doctor can’t fix him? What if he’s doomed to be unable to kiss forever?

At promptly four o’clock there’s a sharp series of knocks on his door. Derek glances around the living room to make sure one more time there’s nothing embarrassing sitting out, and then he double checks himself in the mirror and flattens his hair before he opens the door.

Derek stares.

“Uh, hi, I’m um, looking for a Derek Hale?”

“That’s me,” Derek says. “Are you, um— the Kiss Doctor?”

“Stiles,” is the reply, and the guy grins. It’s charming.

Derek is so fucked. He’s gorgeous and got this soft-looking hair and warm brown eyes and— fuck. Saying something would be good. “I, uh, I don’t know what that is.”

“That’s my name! Can I come in?”

“Oh, yes, I’m sorry. I was just nervous, I guess.”

Derek steps aside and Stiles strides into the apartment confidently, and he can’t help but notice that Stiles has a cute butt as well, high and round and firm-looking in those tight jeans.

“Nice apartment,” Stiles says approvingly. “I’m still at the dorms. I swear it’s getting smaller everyday.”

They chat a little bit about housing, and then classes— Stiles is a psychology major, and wants to go into forensic science, but had a really good time in this counseling workshop he did freshman year and started this couples therapy thing for his friends that kind of took off. It’s nice to hear him talk, to see the ways his whole face shines with passion and his hands kind of flail with excitement. Stiles also has this funny wit to him that Derek finds immediately attractive, and Stiles even laughs at Derek’s attempt at a joke.

Derek’s just starting to relax, the two of them sitting on the couch, when Stiles looks around the room expectantly. “So, where’s your partner? Lydia wasn’t clear on how long you guys were together, only that you had trouble kissing, but this process does kind of involve two people, so.”

Derek blinks. “Um. It’s just me? I’m not dating anyone.”

Stiles frowns. “But— couples counseling—”

“But you’re the Kiss Doctor— I can’t kiss, that’s why I asked you for help.” Derek feels the heat of embarrassment, blood rushing to his face.

Stiles rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “That’s a nickname, and okay, I do understand I have like, a rep, but just because I am okay with a few people making out in front of me and providing pointers and um, I just try my best to help people talk it out and stuff, I’m not like, an expert? I’m a college student, dude.”

“But—” Derek racks his brain, thinking of all the stories Erica told him about the Kiss Doctor’s successes. He even found a couple that he knew and asked them what they thought. “Lorraine and Victor, I know them from my calculus class, they said you like, saved their relationship.”

“Well, they weren’t really communicating with each other. I helped. Maybe with the kissing too, Victor was big on biting and Lorry wasn’t, so getting them on the same page really worked.” Stiles sighs and stands up. “I’m sorry, dude. I really wish I could help.”

“But you can,” Derek says. “Please, I don’t know what else to do.”

“Yeah, but kissing practice kind of requires another person to practice with, duh,” Stiles says.

Derek slumps. He knew he was a lost cause. It’s just his luck, for his friends to go to all the trouble of finding someone to help him and of course, that kind of thing is only for people in relationships already. Clearly Derek just fails at everything.

“This was a terrible idea,” he says, defeated. “Thanks for your time and coming all the way out here.”

He makes to walk Stiles to the door, but Stiles is just giving him a thoughtful look.

“Hey,” Stiles says softly, voice a little nervous. “If you want, um, you could practice with me?”

Derek blinks in disbelief. He’s wanted nothing more than to kiss Stiles since he opened the door, but it’s kind of hard to believe Stiles actually wants to kiss him too.

“It’s okay if you don’t, I mean, I’m not all that—”

“You are,” Derek insists. “Sorry, I just— yeah. Thanks. We can practice. I’d like that.” He takes a deep breath, reminding himself that Stiles is the Kiss Doctor, and he’s probably just doing this because he feels sorry for Derek.

It’s fine. It really is. As long as Derek learns, right?

He guides Stiles to the couch and they sit down.

Stiles takes a deep breath. “Okay, so the first thing about a kiss, is um, after you’ve established that the other party also wants to kiss you, is um, wow, I’ve never thought of this way. It’s kind of hard to explain what I’m doing because usually the two people just start kissing and I just tell them if—”

Derek goes for it; he smashes his lips against Stiles, and the sentence is lost. He tries to give it his best; he likes Stiles, after all, and he just really wants to learn. Stiles’ lips are soft, and they feel nice, and this is all very good and wet and—

“Okay, wow,” Stiles says, pressing a hand gently to Derek’s chest. “That was…”

“Awful, I know,” Derek says.

“No, no, not awful. I can just. Um. So just now, my mouth wasn’t open, and yours was, and you were just kind of slobbering at me right? You’re really eager, which is great. I like that energy, but tone it done a little, and let’s not start with tongue. Let’s try again? Follow my lead.” Stiles leans in close, and he strokes Derek’s cheek, fingers brushing up against his stubble.

Derek nods, taken aback by the golden flecks in Stiles’ eyes. How is anyone supposed to concentrate like this?

Stiles kisses him, a sweet, gentle pressure. Derek doesn’t move, just tries to concentrate on the feeling and tries to press back with the same pressure.

“How was that?” Derek asks, pulling back a bit.

Stiles beams at him. “That was great. Also, another thing— a kiss isn’t just about lips. It’s about the whole moment, being intimate and close with your partner. Your arms are just hanging there by your side, and you’re all kind of tense. Feel free to touch me— rub your hands down my arms, or work your fingers through my hair, I like that, or hold me as we kiss. It’s nice.”

Derek nods again, filing away this information in his head. This time he takes the initiative to lean forward and kiss Stiles, and wraps his arms around him as well, rubbing his back slowly.

Stiles makes a noise of approval, and Derek can feel the hum in his own lips. It tickles, but it’s a pleasant tickle. Emboldened, Derek reaches up to play with Stiles’ hair— and he was right. It _is_ soft.

“You want to try with tongue?” Stiles asks.

Derek _really_ does.

Stiles talks slowly, like he’s putting thought into each word. “It’s not usually something people lead with, but it’s kind of fun. You know, as with everything, talk to your partner and figure out what they like and don’t like.”

“That’s good,” Derek says. “No one— no one ever talked to me, I think they just all expected to be like, Mr. Sex or something.”

“Hmm,” Stiles says. “To be honest, you are jaw-droppingly hot. I guess that just goes to show that people shouldn’t assume. I’m kind of appalled that no one’s taken the time to work on this with you. I mean, I would have— I mean, um—” Stiles blushes. “Let’s just kiss.”

They start slow; it feels nice, Derek enjoying the feel of Stiles lips on his own, and he’s feeling more confident about switching up the angle. Then Stiles’ tongue traces across Derek’s bottom lip, like he’s asking a question.

Derek parts his lips in invitation.

He’s done this before, kissing with tongue, that is. It’s always gone on for too long and Derek’s never felt like he’s enjoyed it much because his partner wasn’t, and quite honestly he never knew what to do, only that in TV and stuff people seemed to do _more_ , and well, no one ever said otherwise, so he just kind of… went all over the place. Swirls, trying to tangle his tongue with theirs, running it across their teeth. It never seemed right and usually sooner than later the other person will end it.

Stiles just… keeps kissing him.

It’s a little strange at first with tongue, but kind of thrilling, and Derek starts using his own as well, teasing his way into Stiles’ mouth. Every now and then Stiles will pause him and say something like, “Don’t suck on my tongue, but I like what you were doing with your hands on my back,” or, “Oh, did you like that? Let me try this angle,” and “Okay, now you’re not using any saliva at all. Keep it a little wet, that’s good.”

Derek’s heart is racing, and he’s never felt so thoroughly _kissed_ before. Stiles leans back, eyes shining, and his face is flushed a bright pink, making the moles on his cheek stand out more.

“How are you feeling? You’re getting really good,” Stiles says, a little breathlessly.

“Yeah, I um, I think I might need more practice?” Derek offers. He rolls his shoulders; they’re cramping up a little from leaning over to kiss so much.

“There are other ways we could kiss,” Stiles says. “If you want. I could— I could sit in your lap? Then you don’t have to bend over and stuff.”

Derek’s brain short circuits a little at the thought of Stiles being so close to him, but he manages to nod.

Stiles inches forward and straddles Derek’s hips, his curve of his ass meeting a part of Derek’s body that is now _very_ interested in these procedures.

Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

Stiles cups Derek’s chin in his hand and draws him close, kissing him again. Scratch that, this was a fantastic idea.

There’s just so much of him to touch, and Derek is hyper aware of the way the bare skin on Stiles’ arms rubs against his own, how Stiles’ legs are wrapped around him, and Stiles bounces a little as he deepens the kiss.

Derek groans when Stiles bites his lip, it’s the combination of surprise and the pleasure that follows that makes him realize that he’s hard.

And he’s not the only one.

Stiles is still lost in the kiss, mouth hot and insistent, and his arms are around Derek’s neck, and it feels so good, hips rocking against Derek and causing the most delicious friction.

“Oh,” Stiles says, panting for breath. “Wow, I’m sorry. Are we still— is this still practicing? Or do you just want to make out with me because you want to?”

“I want to,” Derek blurts. He’s never felt more serious about anything than he is in this moment, and he wants to keep kissing Stiles.

He’s gorgeous, all flushed like this, lips red and kiss-swollen, eyes dark with desire. Stiles grins, a mischievous glint in his eye, and he rocks his hips a little, and it’s just _so much_.

“I’m down to help you practice anything else you want to,” Stiles says with a wink.

“I’m a virgin,” Derek says.

“Okay,” Stiles says with a smile, not a trace of judgement anywhere, just positive confirmation. “So, same as with the kissing— we can do as much or as little as you want, just talk to me about what you like or don’t like and I’ll tell you if I’m into it and we can just figure it out together.”

“Okay,” Derek says, a little lightheaded at the direction today’s events have gone. It’s really hard to think with a lapful of Stiles, but he’s doing his best.

He leans in and kisses the corner of Stiles’ mouth, which makes Stiles pull him closer and then continue the kiss. So it definitely looks like Derek’s doing pretty good on that front.

Stiles pulls back from the kiss with a happy sigh and then he nuzzles his forehead against Derek. They just look at each other for a second, and Derek’s kind of lost in a newfound fondness.

“So you know how you said you weren’t in a relationship?” Stiles asks coyly.

“Yeah?”

“Would you like to be?”

Derek smiles. “Are you asking me out, Stiles?”

“What if I am?” Stiles raises his eyebrows.

Derek sighs. “You know, I don’t think I’m that good at dates, either. Think you can teach me?”

Stiles laughs and leans forward, their noses touching. “How about we figure it out together?”

“I’d like that,” Derek says.

 

* * *

 

 

They don’t end up having any practice dates and skip right to the real thing.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I'm on tumblr [here](http://bleep0bleep.tumblr.com) if you want to say hi.


End file.
